Disciplining children

Parents take on roles of an 'angel' and a 'devil' when it comes to disciplining their children.  Fathers, almost always, take on the latter.  Perhaps it is stereo-typing; perhaps it is so as we are the 'stronger' of the two; perhaps mothers are just too loving and cannot to admonish or punish them.

It is no different when it comes to our family.  I am the disciplinarian to our children.  Their father is the one that gives them the 'look' that they have done something disapproving.  An advocate to the old adage 'Spare the rod and spoil the child', I harden my heart when I need to give them a spanking.

Spanking came a little quicker in the past.  When I was still working in a school, I had little rest; no thanks to my waking up at unearthly hours to mark my students' work.  That meant that I woke up at three and felt tired as early as seven or eight at night, almost straight after dinner.  When my own precious trio threw tantrums, I would get so frustrated when I tended to them and my hand shot out almost instinctively in a bid to resolve things.  I knew, deep down, that it was not right and definitely unfair to them.  That was one of the contributing factors to my leaving my job then.  But that is another story.

I have read and enlightened that scolding or hitting should not happen in anger.  That could just mean that children suffer a beating without knowing why they were subject to such treatment, or worse, that the person who dealt the beating might have been so angry that the hitting would be harder than intended, leading to an unfortunate injury.

Rather, we should decided what actions by our tots deserve such a punishment.  We should also always explain to our children where they had done wrong and what options could have been taken.  Hitting does not mean hurting the child bad.  It could be a hard enough spank on the palm.  Sure, my children cry after they had received spanks on their palms - not because it hurt them bad physically, but also because they understand that they have erred and it struck them in the heart.

So the next time should you decide to hit your children, count to ten and think if you might do something that you might regret later...