Show appreciation today!

"If it ain't broken, don't fix it," some people used to tell me when I meddle in things, trying to better situations.  Why not constantly improve?  Why not better ourselves of things around us?

A former colleague's shout-out of thanks and appreciation for his wife on their wedding anniversary today reminded me this.  I have always maintained that we should show gratitude to people around us constantly.  It need not be on our lips all the time.  It may sound insincere, or worthless, if it goes on for too much, too long.  We should thank people for helping us along our ways.

Forget the grouses you have over petty issues with your close ones.  Haven't the many things they have done for you outweighed the tiny misunderstandings?  Throw the grudges you have lain in your heart so deeply out of the window.  Rebuild ties.  Mend relationships.

Don't you wish you have not lost friends over little disagreements long ago?  Disagreements that do not mean anything to you now?  Isn't it a waste to lose an ally you can count on for assistance, than to have one more enemy who may leave you in the lurch when you are in dire straits?  Apologise.  Say thanks.  Do it today.

Today?  It's not a special day...  Yes, you've heard me right.  Today.  Shower your loved ones and friends with these and you make their day special.  Give them pleasant surprises.  Do not wait until tomorrow.  It may be too late; there may not be a tomorrow.  I know I'm going to contact my younger brother now for his long overdue bout of appreciation...  =)

Top 3 things you frown upon at your neighbourhood park / footpath

Walking along the path at my estate, I shake my head.  And again.  And again.  The reason(s)?  There are just so many things that may be deemed 'wrong', that disturbs the peace and serenity of the neighbourhood.  Or they are just plain unsightly.  Like a group of youths leaving a bench placed in public, leaving empty boxes of crushed cigarettes, dried marks of spilled drinks.  Even better - they take extreme measures to 'hide' their rubbish (this one is a mineral water bottle hidden in some plants - see if you can find it).  They find this easier to do than to walk to the dustbin just a few steps away to dispose it.

Or like a congregation of people blocking the entire walkway, laughing as shrilly as hyenas and louder than the aeroplanes that fly past our block on an almost daily basis.  They make me sigh.

Have you ever seen things like that?  Let's take a vote.  I'll provide you a list of a few things.  We all pick the most dreaded three from the list, lining them up in order of the most hatred to the least of the three using the 'comment' function here.  Leave your name in it too.  Or feel free to also add your own, giving it the next number.  I'll run this vote for a week and we'll sum it up.  Ready?  Here it goes!

Top things that you hate to see / hear at your neighbourhood park / footpath
1.  The incessant ringing from cyclists.  'Ring... ring... ring...'  You hear the ringing of bells from a bicycle approaching you from behind miles away.  So do the other pedestrians along the path.  Everyone moves to the side of the path.  But the ringing does not stop.  Turns head back to show the cyclist that you're aware of his presence.  The ringing goes on.  And it continues even after the bicycle has passed you, all the way for as long as you can hear it...  Irritating.

2.  Little dog on a leash with its owner following behind, reading from a magazine.  Dog stops by a tree beside the path, lifts one of its hind legs to do its business.  Big business sometimes.  Owner nonchalantly walks away behind its dog after that, no bag on hand to pick up after its pet.  Not sure if he even had the intention to...

3.  You are taking a leisurely morning walk at the neighbourhood estate.  You see a group of middle-age people gathered in front of you.  They talk like they are all hard of hearing.  Suddenly, someone blows his nose by pressing his thumb of his right hand at the ground in front of him.  No handkerchief.  The woman beside him stops and clears her throat, then spits phlegm at her side.  Yet another few from the group starts lighting their cigarettes.

4.  You are in a rush and are walking fast.  You suddenly stop.  The path is blocked.  A group of people are leisurely talking, taking up the whole path in front of you.  Short of them holding hands.  You ask for their forgiveness to let you through.  It falls on deaf ears.  There is no passable way as it has just rained and the grass beside the path is flooded / muddy.

5.  'Don't wash dirty linen in the public' they say.  They did not mention not to dry it.  "You know, the sun is brighter / stronger than in my flat..."

6.  This is similar to s/no. 4.  Only this time, the 'pet' is not a pet.  Mother / grandmother chats in estate with neighbours.  The poor child is left to play alone.  Minutes later, child approaches adult as he needed to answer 'nature's call'.  Adult is in the midst of an interesting discussion and does not want to leave it and bring child home.  What's the next best option?  Pull off boy's shorts, holds boy to the grass at the side of the path to ease himself.  Surely we have better sanitary facilities here in Singapore?

7.  Poom!  Poom!  The football is smashed onto the sides of the void deck and multi-purpose halls, leaving dirty ball prints on the once clean walls.  Children giggle on the sight.  Notices sign to indicate no playing of ball games where they are.  Takes aim at the sign.  Bull's eye!  Giggles turn to laughter.  People walk past them.  They do not stop, not caring if the ball were to injure an innocent passer-by.  Cyclists / skateboarders ignoring the signs not to cycle and skate in the park.  Some young cyclists pedal at such breakneck speeds that you dread to think of the consequences if they were to 'run into' a pregnant lady.

There you have it.  More?  Add on as s/no. 8 and beyond.  Let's run this until next Monday.  Which will emerge as the most hated thing seen / heard?

Feeling like a foreigner in...

"...  I said, 'Here I am, here I am, here I am...'  but why do I feel like an invisible man..." sang Joshua Kadison in his song.  Okay, not exactly my sentiments.  However, I do feel like a foreigner every time I step in Chinatown.  Huh?

Don't get me wrong.  I am born and bred in Singapore (though there is a trace of foreign blood in me from my Malaysian born parents).  But being a true blue Singaporean, you will not believe me when I tell you that I have not been to Chinatown for many times in my years.  "What?"  Yes, you've heard me right.  I seldom set foot in our busiest settlement, especially during the Lunar New Year period.

My parents had not brought me there when I was younger.  Along with my penchant for less crowded areas, Chinatown is an area I avoid like a plague.  I hate getting my toes trampled on and bumping into sweaty bodies. Not to mention the fear of getting my pocket picked.  Oh, that too - I like getting what I need and zipping out of the shopping areas (after paying, of course!).

I remember watching Lunar New Year celebration shows broadcasting 'live' from Chinatown and seeing the crowd in the background.  I do not envy the people there one bit.  All these have tallied up all my 'reasons' for not visiting Chinatown these years of my life.  During this block of leave my wife had recently, I suggested gamely to 'explore' the streets there.

We found a number of antique shops - no, not the kind selling vases; the kinds that sold old games, record-players, etc.  If you were looking for stuff used during the seventies or eighties, look no further.  You might just find what you are looking for in shops like those in Chinatown.  Looking for chinese herbs?  A seldom found type of Chinese medicine?  Medical halls are aplenty in Chinatown.

Need a History lesson?  Go to Chinatown.  There, we can find old shophouses, clothes, art forms...  You should even be able to find people who have lived past the second World War if you need to conduct interviews for projects!

I left Chinatown with my wife that day, thankful that we had made that trip.  There was so much colour, vibrance,  so many common sights that we take for granted - all found there.  I now know where my children can go if they need to work on a project on 'the early days of Singapura' later.

A note to all my former students

The dust has settled and the results are out.  You cannot change them.  They are cast in stone.  Sure, in every game and every experience in life, some people will be happy with their 'victories'; some will be disappointed and /or sad with their perceived failure.  Others will be lost as they have no inking on the implication the results will have on their life.  Sadly, that's the case.  Things are decided by us for the future, even before we know what it really means.  Regret is often too little, too late later.

Regret was what I told myself not to feel when I received my PSLE results many years ago when I was a primary six student.  You see, I had done well enough in school without needing to study in the past and my teachers had thought of me highly enough.  You can imagine the shock I had when I received my results.  Numbness was what I felt.  My classmates mostly scored twenty or thirty more marks than me and went on to prestigious schools like The Chinese High School and River Valley High School.

Nobody was on hand to advise me on my choice of schools.  I had no relatives near my age and I was ashamed to talk to my friends.  I did not know how important the six choices I had meant.  I foolishly wasted my first three choices, without doing research about cut-off points.  I went to my fourth choice - Commonwealth Secondary School.

It was perhaps lucky of me for fate to deal me such a kind hand.  It was not the best of places for me to study but I got to know some great people there in my time and bettered my sports skills (or I would not have become your PE teacher!).  Though I wasted my first three years of my secondary school life, wallowing in self-pity and turning my attention into a host of other activities (studies was definitely not one of them), I 'woke' from my 'slumber' in the final year of my secondary school days and studied whatever I should have imprinted in my brain only in the fourth year.

The result?  A lucky pass in 'O' levels and was fortunate enough to be accepted into the polytechnic.  The rest, as they say, is history.  The four salient points of my lesson published.  Take notes now.

1.  Distance is a deciding factor.  Not 'THE' factor.  Friends from old school? Not a factor; you'll make new ones anyway.  What is important is that you go to one that you will not say, "I regret coming..."  The choice now is YOURS (okay, it may be your parents').  Whatever you choose, you are going to LIVE WITH IT for years to come later.  'Regret' is a waste of time.  Make use of the time you will have in the next four or five years.

2.  Don't live in your shadows.  Don't look back and ask yourself what it could have been.  Don't waste time with these.  Work for the future.  Think far.  Think big.  What do you want to be / work as later?  It is NOT very far away, you know.  Work towards it.  An honest job is not degrading.  Nobody can look down on you but yourself.

3.  Express or normal?  I normally tell people, "Whatever you feel comfortable."  Really?  No!  Go to 'normal' first, and work hard in the first year?  You would have missed out the extra things being taught in 'express'.  By the time you switch to 'express' in year two, you will have a steeper learning curve.  Take the plunge.  Go for 'express'.  If you find that it's not your cup of tea later, switching to the other stream then is not going to be too late.

4.  Most important lesson - STOP WASTING YOUR TIME PLAYING!  STUDY!  This is the ONLY time that matters - to make it to a junior college, or not.  To ensure yourself a 'smoother' journey to the university later.  Lose these years and you might find yourself like me - at a stage of my life lamenting how lowly paid I am as a civil servant, just because I do not have a degree.  Do not rely on others.  Do not turn left and right now.  YOU HOLD THE KEY TO YOUR SUCCESS IN LIFE.

Do not ask me which secondary school you should go to now.  You will not, if you have understood me well.  Going to a 'good' school just gives you a better environment to pave your way to success.  All the best for your future and feel free to keep in touch.

Stop being a busybody??

If you see someone 'disturbing' a cat in your estate, 'poking' it in the face and body with a long, thin blade of grass, causing the poor cat to jump at the grass everytime and seemingly 'fighting' against it, would you step forward to stop the person?  If you see the person in the lift standing by the buttons not holding the door for young children to enter the lift, would you suggest that he does it the next time?

Well, that's just what I did recently.  And they are just two examples of 'Mr. Civic-Minded' at work.  I frown upon people not holding the door for the person just a step behind.  Like a stern discipline master, I lambast those who fight shamelessly for seats in trains and slump straightaway into deep slumber, beating the elderly wearing a whole head of white hair.  These are just examples.  Of course, when put in those situations, I will be the first to offer assistance.

I engaged in an interesting discussion (it leaned precariously close into an argument) with Yen yesterday.  She asked me to 'close an eye to somethings'; to 'live and let live' on things,  for the sake of her and our young ones. She explained that it was in case those 'at fault' were to react poorly against me or the situation.  I was dumbfounded.  Do I turn a blind eye to these?

Yen asked me what I had intended to achieve by pointing out what should be done instead in those situations.  Well, to put things right, hopefully, at that time.  If not, then the next time such a situation occurs.  How?  By creating public awareness.  By slamming those who do wrong and pressurizing them into doing the right thing.  My wife then pointed out that by reacting to those situations, I did not seem that gracious too.

Perhaps.  Perhaps by reacting in frustration in the spur of the moment, I, like a man forced to make a decision with a pistol pointed at his temple, could not evaluate what was the best course of action to take.  I did not want to lose the opportunity to point out what should have been done.  Sigh.  Do I just accept things?  That some people are just the way they are, that they 'were not taught to be as thoughtful and will have to learn some other way' - as Yen put it?  Maybe that is my problem - that I am too much of a busybody?

Our Christmas tree

We are not Christians.  Well, at least not yet.  It had never been a family tradition to have a Christmas tree up during the Christmas holidays.  It was until I got married and moved into our current flat, which had a little more space and is seemingly less 'cluttered', that Yen and I purchased a Christmas tree and shopped for decorations.

I think I was saying that I wanted our children to know and 'feel' the celebrations for the festive occasions.  Well, somehow, I did not put up big red decorations for the Lunar New Year.  I wonder why?

Christmas these past few years have seen us set up a tree for the festival at home.  Thus far, our elder princess and prince have been obedient when told not to go near the tree, not to lay their hands on it.  So we decided to set it up again this year.  And we were going to involve our children henceforth.  How exciting it will be for them now, I thought.  I was right.

I have been telling them that we were going to put up the said tree soon, but we had not found the opportune time yet.  Rachel and Felix sure had their eyes glimmering with excitement when they saw the foreign-looking box containing the Christmas tree sitting in the living room after their nap on the past Sunday.

They could not wait to get started in helping out too.  From the word 'go', they wrapped their little hands all over the tree.  I had a hard time trying to tell them what to do whilst trying to figure it out myself too.  You cannot blame me for my predicament.  I see the tree for about a month annually and this is only our fourth meeting!

Our ever-enthusiastic children helped set the tree up and put the decorations on it.  Blame it on their height that they were constantly decorating the same place of the tree closest to them!  Yen and I had to constantly remind them to move to other places around the tree to hang their mini 'disco balls', 'snowflakes', etc. on different parts of the tree.

 

All these, too, while we tried to capture the precious moments of their joy on camera so that they can grow up and reminisce on these good times they had.

The result?  An exuberant pair of children, proud of their good work.  And a silent destroyer in the form of their young baby sister.

 

Taking a family photograph

I have always envied my friends who have family photographs displayed at home.  To me, it somehow examplifies the close bonds the family has built within itself across the years.  It is with joy too, to see the progress in the members of the family - the ageing (in a nice way!), the growing of the children, the addition of members, the upgrade of status (think education - taking a photograph after receiving a university degree by each child-member).

I have never had one taken.  That is why when my father passed on a few years ago, I felt a sense of void.  I felt regret, something that I normally tell myself not to have in life.  Regret that I had not been able to let my father lead a comfortable life before he moved on.  Regret that I had not given him the opportunity to see his elder son get married and let him carry his own grandchild.  Regret that he left us too little memories.

My father was a man of few words.  He rarely spoke to us.  Much less take photographs.  The only one that he left me was this 5R one of him at work.  Think he was not aware of someone taking that photograph and it was probably given to him as a souvenir of his long service with his former employer, Port of Singapore Authorities.

I respected him as my father.  However, I cannot say that we were extremely close as family.  We hardly did things together.  Sigh.  When I looked at my friends and their parents, I sometimes turn green...  But I digress.  I want a family photograph with my own family.  For memories.  For reminiscing later.

I was making use of this month-long break to tidy up my things that I had just stashed away in my study last week when I came across this receipt.  To my pleasant surprise, it was one dated 14 Dec 2004, from a phtography studio.  The package I bought was for photography services of some basic photograph-package.  Excited, I called the company (had to make sure that it was still in operation) to check that it honoured my receipt.  I then proceeded to make an appointment for a family photography shoot the following Sunday.

Fast forward.  Today was the day.  It was a huge challenge getting my three jewels co-operating in front of the camera.  Torturous at times.  I almost pulled some hair off my scalp this afternoon and got a quick hair-trim.  But we managed to get through it and I came back a happy man.  I will not get to hang up the pictures on my wall so soon, but it will be in time for Christmas, I think.  Great!  One more milestone reached in my family's journey.

What English is that?

No, you've guessed it wrong.  I am not writing this in support of our Government's Speak Good English movement.  Sure, there is quite a bit of wrong signages everywhere.  Perhaps those who manufacture the signages ought to have professional English checkers.  Then, end of story.  No more problem.  I am actually writing about the English on books teaching English to our impressionable infants and toddlers, our future.

We as parents buy toys that, hopefully, teach our children things as they play.  This is especially so for books.  But I have come across some play-stuff that need our attention, rectification (probably).  This is a set of flashcards that teaches children English as well as Chinese languages, showing the intended audience pictures of the words.  Not sure its place of origin. (If you are thinking about China, I urge you not to always condemn goods from China.  It is not fair!)

Where does my problem with it stem from?  Take a look at this one:

A 'washer' is defined as a 'washing machine' in 'dictionary.com'.  However, in this part of the world we are, we are taught that the item pictured is a 'washing machine'.  Children may be confused with the different terms used to identify the same thing at the young age they are at.  Another example:

Isn't it a laptop?  The word 'computer' is more generally used to point to the personal computer, or desktop.  The one with a Central Processing Unit and a monitor, where a separate keyboard and mouse is normally attached to make it work.  Confused.  Think that's all?  You're wrong.  Look:

The former shows, when, a bell (clock).  The latter shows a clock (alarm clock) as well.  And both are not actually bells!  You have made me a confused child!  More:

'Counter'?  'Scoop'?  'Dentifrice'?  'Handset'?  Aren't they more commonly known here as 'calculator', 'ladle', 'toothpaste' and 'mobile phone' (okay okay, many call it 'handphone', but that's the South-east Asian term for the item!) here?  Can we not see that it is a tube of toothpaste in the second picture here?  Why make it difficult with 'dentifrice' - 'a paste, powder, liquid, or other preparation for cleaning the teeth'?

I reckon that as parents, we have to play a bigger part in the learning of our young children.  We cannot just buy stuff and hope for our children to learn the correct things from them.  We have to step in to discern between right and wrong too.  Else, our children may learn the wrong things and it will be difficult for them to 'unlearn' these things later...

School's out!

School's out, officially today!  No more books, no more classes and studies, no more teachers for children - all until the end of the year, at least.  No need to worry about our children's results and behaviour in school for children.  Sounds all good, but is it really?
Sorry, I beg to differ.  Being at home most times this month, it is the beginning of a nightmarish end of the end for me.  How?  You see, the way HDB flats are built these days are revolving around the concept of little estates.  A few block of flats will be built in a oval-shaped manner, or sporadically around some amenities like car parks, badminton courts, playgrounds, multi-purpose halls, etc.  Great idea?  Perhaps not.

When children have their holiday breaks, as experienced over the past few years I have stayed here, they have nowhere to 'hang out'.  The best place would be the playground and badminton court area.  Healthy lifestyle, so what is the problem?  It is when they let their hair down and get so engaged with their games that they create excessive noise, screaming and shouting for hours, on a daily basis on weekdays.  The noise is enclosed within the blocks and is brought upwards.  I stay on the upper floot of my block not too near (at least not next to the amenities) and I still get it quite bad.  I cannot imagine if my block of flats is any closer to the heat of the action.

Along with that, they play football at the multi-purpose hall area.  I am fine with them 'dirtying the walls', but I frown at the noise created and the safety-hazard they  pose when they play on and children / old folks walk close to the hall.  They are sometimes oblivious to the people / things around...  sigh...  Not to mention the vulgarities they spout!  Puts us adults to shame with their wonderful vocabulary, sometimes...

What can we do about it then?  Short of rounding them up and putting them behind bars for 'disrupting public serenity' (don't think there is such a law)?  Can their parents sign them up for some holiday class that will take their time away until parents take them home after work?  (Isn't that akin to childcare / studentcare?  Don't they want to lay of learning and books for this time?)  Or can some organisation come out with some novel idea that engage them?  Somebody?  Anybody?...

Itch itch!

“Eeeek!” Rachel screamed.  “What is this?”  she asked curiously, pointing to the many red dots spread across Kayleen’s back.  Yen and I took a closer look.  Yes, what was it?  Was it some kind of illness she picked up from her week at the play-school?

The dots were like rashes.  I checked her rashes against some pictures I found on the Internet when I searched for ‘childhood skin conditions’.  HFMD?  No.  Chicken pox?  Definitely not.  A match with a few more pictures proved a failed attempt.  And thankfully too.  So what was it really?  I told Yen that we would bring her to the doctor’s if her condition worsened the next day.

I forgot that it was the holidays - Hari Raya Haji.  Polyclinics close on that day!  Fortunately there are two clinics in the neighbouring Pioneer Mall.  We found that her condition had not improved the evening of the holiday – the rashes have spread to the front of the body, her neck and also her calves.  Though I would still consider them mild, we decided to bring her to the opened clinic for a visit.

The rashes do not see too obvious in the pictures, no thanks to the bright lights the pictures were taken under.  But if you do notice the red spots, redden them by five to ten times in your imagination and you'd get a better idea of what we had seen..

The wait was not too long as we had made a telephone call to the clinic to get a queue number prior to our visit.  The doctor who saw Kayleen decided straightaway that it was not the dreaded HFMD, nor was it chicken pox or anything very serious.  He did not attempt to guess what it was; merely said it was some allergy.  He issued our younger princess with two days’ medical leave and some medication.

Kayleen still seemed a little restless.  Other than that, she is fine today.  She is not scratching on the rashes as much today.  We have not used any other the medication the doctor had prescribed for our princess, thanks to advice from Yen (Mommy knows best!).  The episode raised another mini-alarm in our household – just another day in the life of a parent with three young children, I guess…

Print, print, everywhere

"Look, daddy!  'Stop'!" Felix exclaimed excitedly.  That followed the most adorable laughter from Rachel and him.  I smile.  "Yes, daddy stopped the car...  How do you spell the word?" I replied.  I was secretly glad that they could recognise and spell the word, at the ages four and three respectively.  I am not sure if I could have spelt the word when I was their age.  No, I don't think I could.

Yes, their play-school has played their part in teaching them to read, to recognise letters.  I reckon the 'Hi-5!' and other CDs must have aided their learning.  The Government and everyone else chip in by displaying signages (some worded) in numerous places.  Yen and I would make use of these to try teach our elder children to recognise those words and if possible, try spell them.

I go a step further.  I try to seize every opportunity I can to help them spell words.  If they are learning and remembering due to phonics, that is great.  Else, I try to make them repeat after me.  To me, a word learnt now at their tender age means a word less to learn for spelling, or whatever, later.  Felix can spell quite a few names of animals, many simple words (like 'go', 'team', 'love', etc.) and 'one' to 'ten', with aplomb!  Now, even some of my former students cannot do that in primary three / four!

I tried to list out the words that Felix can spell, and at age three, the number of words amaze me.  I lost count.  Sure, I worry that it is memory work mostly.  I know that when I read with him, and he constantly get words that he should be able to pronounce wrong.  But there is a long way ahead, a long time to learn.

Just today, I decided that since the walls of the passageway leading to their room is bare, and we have bought a few wall charts for them, I should make use of the charts to decorate the wall.  In the same way, I hope my two elder children and later, Kayleen, will always stop by and recall the words and how they are spelt.

I have seen it somewhere that some take greater effort, by labelling the things around the house and sticking them on the things (e.g. Stick the word 'Refrigerator' and its chinese characters on the item itself).  At this moment, I need not do that.  But who knows, in a year or two, I'll make it into a game and ask the children to stick the words onto the items by themselves.  *Tsk tsk*

I think I have bought more of such charts and stashed them somewhere earlier.  Better find them soon and put them up.  Bought them anyway - better make the money 'money well spent'!   They enjoy reading and listening to us read to them.  Again, I make a conscious effort to make them lead me through the words and help them when they are stuck.  I'll be glad if they can finish books (albeit short ones) by themselves a little later.

I am a little worried at their ability to converse in Mandarin, though.  Our children seem to prefer using the English language, even when we speak to them in Mandarin.  Not that there is anything wrong, but we want them to be effectively bilingual.  Not to mention that it is still going to be tested later in school.  We have bought them Chinese CDs, tried speaking to them and insisting that they answer in Mandarin...  Ha.  Starting to see the anxiety parents have when their children take examinations.

Does anyone tried sucessfully for their children to converse in mother tongue?  Do give me some ideas.  Or is tuition classes the way to turn to??

Perhaps it is a 'rewarding' career after all??

"Why choose teaching as a profession?" the interviewer asked me five years ago at my job interview.  I had a ready (well thought through) answer.  I wanted to impact and influence the lives of children, who I believe can make changes to contribute to the society, to become useful persons.  Five years later, after withdrawing myself from the ministry, how much of that has changed?

Not too much, I guess.  After all, I am not a hypocrite, to have said things I did not believed in, just to clinch the job.  That's why I am still in the profession.  It is just that I have changed my employer, the environment.  The target audience is still the same - students.

Some, like my good buddy Wilson's mother, have went on and on to share with me the joys of teaching, on how rewarding a career it would be.  I guess it would be one, but was just not too sure if I would stay sane enough to reap the rewards of the seeds I sow.  I mean - I will have to wait years - and I emphasise, YEARS - to have an inking of my former students' success in life, for them to grow up and have their own jobs and families...

The first wave of rewards, perhaps, is usually from the parents.  Their commendations, their praises, their thanks - the first sign of whether you have taught, or not, to their children.  Before you get turned off here, I just want to quantify again that this is not my avenue of self-glorification, of narcissism.  No, just a reflection of things in life...  Back to the subject at-hand...

My students may remember me telling them, borrowing a phrase, "I am not teaching you how to pass your examinations and tests; I am teaching you how to 'fish', so that you will not starve when you are on your own in future..."  I am not sure how many of them understood what I meant when I told them what I said, but I sincerely hope they will 'see the light', sooner rather than later.

I do not think I am that likeable to my students as an English language teacher (they could like my Physical Education lessons, though).  Thus, I have not, in my short span of three years as a teacher in school, received many notes of thanks and appreciation.  However, I am always happy when parents of my students tell me, in the form of verbal confrontations, text messages, emails or letters, that their children love to be in my class and have been learning a lot from me.  Or they could just thank me for my effort I had put in.  That is enough for me.

One of my former students' parents did more than that this morning.  Mrs Chew, mother of Sherman, called me up the previous night to ask me to meet her as she had something to pass to me.  It was, she said, some chocolates / sweets for my children, in appreciation for the time I had spent working with Sherman on my own free will.

You see, I had planned to leave the ministry some time ago and this year, I just thought I wanted to do more for some of my students.  I approached two of them - Qishun and Sherman - and asked them if they were interested in doing some additional work in English language with me.  They were both my students in my maiden year as a form teacher in 2008, P4 Robin.  Why them?  Were they THAT poor in the language, you might ask?  Were they financially poor that they cannot afford tuition lessons?  No, on the contrary, they were my number two and three in the class at the end of that year.  I asked them as I thought they are very hardworking and driven, and should benefit with an extra adult looking at their work with them.

Why not other students?  Was I not being fair?  You see, I did not close off all doors to other students.  If any student were to approach me to ask me why I was being unfair and doing extra with only these two, I would have invited them to join us with open arms.  I asked the two of them merely because I believed that they would want me to 'do some work' with them.  I gave them extra work - on top of those that they have been given in school and at tuition - and they completed the work faithfully almost everytime I asked them to, giving me no excuses for anything that would have thwarted their attempts to complete work I asked them to do.

We had our weekly, two-hour session in an open area of the school while I was still a member of the school I was teaching.  From June, we had our sessions in Tiong Bahru Plaza.  Thankfully, we were not chased out by the management and staff at the Burger King there.  We were not distracted by the people or things around us.  The sessions were enjoyable.

I received a text message from Sherman's mother, saying that she wanted to pass me something as a form of their gratitude to me for having 'tutored' their son.  I did not ask, neither did I expect to receive anything, so I did not know what to expect.  I met them at the front gate of the school this morning and spoke to them.  They expressed their thanks for my having helped their son for nothing, and spending my 'personal' time.  It left a warm feeling in my heart, knowing that we had done the best we could in our circumstances for Sherman, and I could recognise the unconditional love in Mr and Mrs Chew.

I had not spent time doing extra 'work' with the two boys for the bag of sweets that came from Japan.  I had not done them for money (though it would have helped me financially...).  It was, perhaps, the joy of teaching, the smile that I hope to see on the faces of the children and their parents come next week, or for something more meaningful they were going to do later in life.

Mega-memory (not!)

“Daddy!  Did you remember to ask about Kayleen’s uniform for their play-school?”  Yen checked with me casually (well, it sounded casually at first!) just the other day.  I forgot.  I provided some silly excuse, about how the neighbouring squirrel in the play-school’s compounds distracted me…  “And where is the lunchbox that was used to contain their breakfast?” I almost choked.  Left in play-school!  How can someone so muddle-headed and forgetful be left alone to take care of three children?

True enough, I shall have to admit that memory work is not one of my strengths.  Tell me something and I’ll forget about it fifteen minutes flat later.  Serious.  But ‘To err is with human’, right?  We are bound to make errors.  It is just that mine are more glaring when it comes to recalling things. 

Friends schooled in psychology will tell you that ‘forgetting’ is an area of research as well, as will Wikipedia.  It explained that it may be due to something that has not been done before – that is somewhat new to us – that we may not be able to commit to memory (I cannot say I had never done this breakfast thing with them before!).  Or it may be that we were ‘disturbed’ by other things when we were trying to remember something (in my case – the squirrel).  Worse, it is the work of a greater illness, like dementia or something!

Dementia?  No!  According to a website, there is no cure for it at this moment and “it is currently not possible to restore brain cells affected by the disease”.  How do we avoid dementia then?

Our very own Health Promotion Board recommends taking fruit, vegetables, cocoa, etc. to improve blood flow and protect brain tissues.  Of course, we have to keep thinking and moving.  Makes sense as staying thoughtless probably aids one in going senile.


Food for thought.  Mull over it.  I'll catch up with you later, after I sip a nice cup of coffee studying why the squirrel can run along a barbwire without getting itself injured.

Mountains of bills!!

I did not think I had to stay with Kayleen in play-school this morning.  The energetic girl took little time to settle into play-school and was even waving goodbye to me without any trace of ever wanting to turn back when she was led to her class area by her elder sister.  That gave me a little 'me' time (like what my friend Nancy called it) to sort out the odds and ends at home.

The first task without children around was one that was long-overdue.  The document tray in our study looked badly overloaded, like another piece of document or letter placed on it will cause it to fall apart and crumble anytime.  There was a hill, no - a mountain, of documents waiting for me to file up over the past ten months.  Okay, I was over-exaggerating here.  But you get the idea.

This is only a 'part' of the mess I created this morning

A couple of hours into it only saw me managing to sort them out by category.  Of course, I never fail to side-track and manage to start a new Excel spreadsheet to track my family's expenses using the bills.  I have to constantly keep my expenses and monies in check.  Rising costs and growing children...  Parents can attest to what I have mentioned here!

SingTel bill, StarHub bill,  Singapore Power bill...  whoa!  We spent excessively on water and electricity that month...  Can I scrimp on my SCV and power usage in the house?  Is there a better plan, or one that would suit my uses better?  What sort of insurance policies have I bought for my mother, wife and children?  Are they enough??  Sigh...  All these go through my mind during my tidying up.  They all mean money out of the pocket (or bank, if you use GIRO).

But I digress.  Three hours in, I have yet to accomplish my tidying.  *Gasp*  There is another part to go...  have to complete everything before my children return and re-mess up the mess!

Kayleen's first day at play-school

It is the time of our children’s lives again – the first day of school!  Yes, it is just play-school, and we have two previous experiences earlier in Rachel and Felix, so everything should be a breeze for Kayleen’s first day at play-school.  Or is it?

I was lulled into complacency.  A false sense of belief that we have everything that Kayleen might need two weeks before her scheduled entrance into The Little Skool-House (On-the-Hill).  She must have everything that is needed!  She can always get things from hand-me-downs…  It was Yen who pressed urgently for us to get Kayleen a new bag and waterbottle days before the past Monday that jolted me back into reality.  That sprang us into action over the past weekend, before we finally settled on a ‘Minnie Mouse’ pink bag and a ‘Barney’ bottle that she could readily identify.

As of our elder princess and prince, who had Yen to accompany them and ensure that they would gel into the play-school and its environment, Kayleen had, well, yours truly.  Not her obvious choice, I am sure, but the play-school was probably glad that I had come as Kayleen did not cling on to me that much.

She was oblivious to the change from norm - she needed to follow us in the morning on her first day.  She explored the toys around upon reaching the ‘Toddler’ class activity area and showed no signs of not being used to the place at all.

Kaleen experienced many ‘first’s this day – attending play-school, playing in the midst of a class, as well as playing with paint.  That is something we have not tried giving our children due to the mess that comes along with the fun.  Kayleen took all these in good stride, I guess, from the look of things.

Lunch was a chore as she has only developed four teeth – the two upper and lower front ones.  That, and the fact that she had always been pampered and fed at home gave the teachers an additional task during her meal-time.  I stayed with her until a quick bath and nap.  Kayleen had trouble napping initially.  Perhaps it was due to the fact that she normally slept at two-plus.  Or perhaps I was around.  So I left the premises of the play-school a little before midday to try letting her gain her independence from family.

By the time I returned, she had awoken and on seeing me, Kayleen stretched out her arms to me, signalling that she wanted me to carry her.  Smart lass!  Thinking of home already!  Unfortunately, her elder siblings had enrichment programmes (in the form of some gymnastics class) and I had to leave her wanting.  Sigh!

By the time we were ready to go at five, she had attended her first full-day at play-school.  She was probably excited to see Yen when we made a stop to pick Yen up.  At home, she was quite normal too.  All things bode well for day two at play-school, the beginning of her few years here…  =)

An eye-opening weekend with a Volkswagen Golf

"Call in now for your chance to win a weekend-drive with a Volkswagen..." Sounded interesting enough!  I had never driven a Volkswagen car before this...  Why not try?  I called in on the cue and after a few tries, and I got through!  The Flying Dutchman from Class 95FM asked me a simple-enough question on the Volkswagen after I had sent my wife to work and children to play-school.  That happened a couple of weeks ago and I won the chance for a weekend drive for a Volkswagen car!

Luck would have it that there was some communication error between the radio deejay and me, and he did not get my contact number down clearly enough.  I was wondering if the whole episode was a dream as I had not received any telephone call from anyone a couple of weeks after 'winning' the contest over the air?  A couple of weeks later, I was checking my email (which I sometimes have the tendency not to check regularly) and found that the good people at Volkswagen Singapore had been waiting for me to give them my contact number via email!  Ha, I still had the chance for the drive!

I have to confess that I had thought I won the chance to drive a Beetle for a weekend.  I knew there were quite a few models (I found out that there were a total of 28!) of Volkswagen cars, but I was perhaps believing in what I was hoping for more than anything!  Ha!  I only found out later that it was a Golf I had won the chance to drive.  I was not really disappointed.  I mean - it was still a prestigious Volkswagen car I was going to drive!

Visiting the Volkswagen centre in Leng Kee Road for the first time on the day I ws to pick the car up, I was in awe.  It was not just big, but rather, it was humongous!  It had more than enough 'leg-room' to display the many models of cars they had to showcase, spick-and-span and very high-tech!  It had a cafe for its prospective customers to enjoy a cuppa, tipping the scales towards buying a car with the brand.  Awesome!

The lady who came to help me with claiming the drive, Ms Choo, was very friendly and helpful too!    Though I was not there on the premise of buying a car, she did not make me feel like I needed to be obliged to do so.  Ms Choo handed me a little goodie-bag (nice gesture from Volkswagen) and got the relevant paperwork done with me within minutes.  Efficient!

Ms Choo brought me up to the centre's roof where my 'prize' was parked.  I liked what I saw - the light-blue hatchback glimmered against the hue of the evening sun.  She went through every detail I needed to know about the car and made me feel at ease with everything.  I was thoroughly sold-on the grandeur of the vehicle and its interior that made me feel at ease the moment I set-foot in it!  Ms Choo gave me contact numbers I needed, in case I needed to call anyone (touch wood!).  Finally, the drive!

First stop, I went to pick Yen and my elder children up.  They liked the exterior of the blue car I drove there.  Yen got in the passenger's seat and felt the same way that I did - the dashboard of the car looks very nice!  Futuristic but not over-the-top, the user-friendly display won our hearts hands-down.  When I got it on the road, she liked the smooth acceleration, the seemingly "uninterrupted gear-changes" - the way Class 95's Glenn Ong put it.  Unlike some cars, the car did not produce any noise during gear changes  Smooth!

Oh, I haven't mentioned how light the doors were, that my four-year-old elder princess and three-year-old prince found no trouble in handling?  It gives me a very sturdy and comfortable feel - my children fell asleep a little past ten minutes into the drive from East Coast to our place in Jurong West, and they were not awokened by any bump or rough jerks the car might have made along the way.  Great comfort!

I could not wait to hear the review from my brother, Eddie, when we went to our old place in Clementi in a proposed meeting between us and our long-time neighbours.  Being a previous car-dealer, he was impressed by the Golf's performance considering it was only a 1.2L.  The car had a 'Sport' mode, kind of like a 'Cruising' mode - I guess - that maximised fuel economy too.

The drive these few days has given me a very good impression of the car with its new TSI engine.  It brought smiles to my my and children.  I would seriously consider purchasing the car if I had to change our family WISH years later...