Crocs - do you own them?? Beware!

"Escalator injuries with rubber clogs on the rise" reported The Straits Times on their Home section on 3 December.  It reported that KKH has 'counted eight such incidents' from the beginnning of the year up to November.  We have read about the many injuries suffered and the near-misses reported.  Why do parents still buy their children the popular brand of rubber clogs?

Stylish, affordable and/or fashionable these sandals are, I have never fallen into the trap of getting a pair.  Neither for ourselves nor for our precious darlings.  After reading all those reports with the adverse news / consequences on them, I am petrified.  I do not want a day where I will have to be interviewed on how my child's / children's toes get trapped between the steps of the escalator!

Some people have reported how light the crocs are, and how they feel a 'wobble' when they are on the escalator that may cause accidents too.  I opine that parents should, for the sake of safety of their children, consider carefully if the sandals are worth the risk.

Still, to each his own.  If you feel there is no cause for concern, and you are not going to fall victim to accidents involving such sandals, I still urge you to read some safety tips the newspaper suggested in that edition:
1.  Do not allow children to ride escalators unsupervised.
2.  Adults should be on the same step, and not behind, their children.
3.  Children should face the front and hold the hand-grip firmly if they can reach them.
4.  Ensure children stand in the middle of a step and not at the edge.  Footwear can be easily trapped when their feet are at the steps' edges.
5.  Be careful of the children's clothing that may get trapped in hte grooves of escalators.
6.  Do not let your children sit or play whilst on escalator steps.
7.  Do not allow your children to lean on the handrails.

We sometimes do not take note of some seemingly trivial safety tips, until it is too late.  I hope everyone stay safe with the festive season looming.  Merry Christmas!

A phrase a week, chases the boredom away...

Miss Little Princess has settled in well in play-school.  The initial period where she did not know what was happening and was left in play-school jolted her out of her comfort zone.  The second phase was the 'clingy' phase - following us to play-school happily in the morning, but hanging on to Daddy once she was there.  One might mistake her for a koala in the dimness!

As the days passed, she has got more and more used to the teachers there.  These days, she gets excited and happy to greet them, going, "Hello, tea*^%!"  She still cannot get the word teacher and the name out, but all the same, her teachers were glad to be acknowledged by our adorable children, especially the tiny one.

There are words and phrases, however, she has learnt that are clearly pronounced.  Nobody has used these phrases too much at home, so I can only conclude that she has learnt them from school.  Like the first one, "Kor kor pushing..."  Poor Felix was seated across the room, minding his own business!

This lasted for quite a while.  In fact, she still springs this phrase every now and then, whenever she feels 'bullied' (toys not being shared), or out of plain boredom!  Rachel is not spared from the accusation too...

Then came "Ah ma, hui lai le!" in Mandarin, meaning "Grandma, I'm home!".  This was from her siblings, and is pleasing.  She may not know what it means, totally, as she could be home for minutes already and she is still repeating the same phrase!

The most recent one is "Daddy, can you &%^(*#@,,," Yes, I can, if only I understand your request!  She could go on asking this for minutes, undaunted by the lack of response from us!  This adorable little girl!

Playing meaningful games

"Children learn best when they are playing".  I have heard this many a time during my stint in school.  It could be true, but I had never been able to find time to devise interesting enough games that is not just mindless banter and laughter, and for learning to actually take place in lessons.  Pounded with the many additional demands that lay on teachers in the shorter than a marathon's time children have with teachers for our academic subjects, it just seems impossible to include games in their learning.

Perhaps I can try including games in my children's learning?  But how?  Enter this book I bought some months back "Number and Logic Games" by Dr D. Einon, Hamlyn (publisher).  I only had time to read it recently after settling down in my new job and schedule and am in the midst of it.  I read with interest some activities that may be interesting for my preschoolers and tried out this activity.


This one is called 'Match the Pictures", aimed at helping children to practise their counting skills by getting them to link matching numbers of items.  It required me to draw six circles and numbers of items in them, so that every two circles willl have matching numbers of items.  Children are to count the number of objects and to draw lines to match circles.  I came out with these:


Amateurish, eh?  Ha.  It will do for now.  I put the activity to the test with Rachel and Felix.  I designed the simplier on on shapes for Felix so he does not get distracted.  The result?

Rachel and Felix enjoyed the short activity.  They were serious in counting and drawing a line to the matching number of objects.  The book offered an extension activity too - to find the odd one out by adding an extra circle with a different number of objects.  Think this short (it only took two to three minutes!) activity helped me in my learning of my children's capability.  They are looking forward to another round of a similar counting and line-drawing, as promised by Daddy!

What is the difference between an A-student and an F-grader?

“Rachel, Felix and Kayleen, you have done very well for your tests in school!”  I hope to be able to say this to them when they do attend primary and secondary schools later.  A bit too early?  I guess.  But it’s not too much of me to dream about it and to work us towards it, is it?  This goes a long way towards ‘The Good Life’ that many yearn to have, to working in offices and earning respectable incomes, as opposed to toiling under the scorching sun for hard-earned pay?

So, what is really the difference?  Is it totally in the genes, that it cannot be helped?  Hey, even the poor can turn the tables and become successful business-people given their hard work, intuition and luck, among other things!  How can we discover the potential in children, to aid them in knowing more to be successful in life?

First and foremost, let me begin by examining school children.  I have seen quite a few of them in these few years.  Pupils in the top classes and the better ones in my classes – what do they have that others might not have?  Is it riches?  I hope not…  Is it time?  Definitely not!  Then what is it?  Wait!  Most of those in the top classes have people to pick them up after school…  and not just domestic helpers who take up the job of fetching them from school!  They are in good hands, good company of educated parents.

Is the most distinct and integral difference having parents by their side most steps of their way?  I recall those in my classes.  I have never been the form-teacher of top classes in the school, perhaps due to the perception that I am not worthy, or the fact that I can only be a subject-teacher and may not be able to bring out the best in the cream-of-the-crop.

But I recall the top students in my classes…  they were mostly independent children who can take good care of themselves (who do not spend needless time at the playgrounds or chatting on the Internet at their age), or they had educated parents who were not working, sacrificing time during their children’s schooling years to take care of them.  Else, their parents are those who are busy working, but are in their own ways, quite heavily involved in their children's lives.

Did they have tuition?  Yes, half of them did.  But this does not explain how those who did not have tuition manage to come out tops in their tests.  One thing I do observe is that these children were not alienated by their parents (or vice-versa).  I could always hear them speaking fondly of their parents during our conversations.  About them spending time with them, telling them things, buying things for them… (no, you do not have to be rich to make your child happy!)  They are closely bonded.  They talk.  About schoolwork, their teachers, classmates, subjects, relatives… almost everything and anything under the roof of their scalp!

Why are some of my children’s classmates loquacious and conversant?  They are of the same age!  What is their secret?  Perhaps talk?  Maybe their parents have been spending meaningful time talking to them about things, and allowing them to make meaningful responses, apart from reading?

This talk, helps, I think.  It helps them in their oral abilities, in their forming of sentences, in their worldly-knowledge (it beats having me explain something to them than to let them go on the Internet and chancing upon unsavoury websites!) and more.  Letting them be comfortable speaking to us (parents) cannot be too wrong.  They may tell us things that we are worried about (their needs, their wants, and maybe even their crushes!).  We can advise them with an open-mind.

Parents can then encourage them to make the right decisions, to pull the reins back if they have veered off-course.  I think I may even create scenarios (like they did in some schools) for them to go to a ‘shop-keeper’ to ‘buy’ something!  To ask ‘someone’ for directions!  That’ll be fun!

So have you been speaking to your child(ren)?  I know I am going to start today!

Adventures of Captain (Wet) Underpants!

“Mommy…  *cry*…”

“Felix wet his bed.  Again.  I thought we sent him to the washroom the previous night, before they retired to bed!” Yen was exasperated.  Felix does not exactly help when he stood there wailing, inconsolable.  How can we help?  Why is this happening?  Rachel does not seem to have this problem.  Not in her younger days.  Not now.

How can we stop him from causing us this inconvenience?

Out of ideas, I tried getting him to wear a diaper.  This was in a bid to try and get him to resist it, and be more aware of him problem.  I was naïve.  Felix thought for a while.  He resisted my 'diaper'-idea for sometime, saying he was a “big boy”.  But threw in the towel, eventually.  He gamely accepted the “preventive measure”.  Oh no!  Not exactly what I had in mind!

But the idea seemed to work.  That night, Felix did not wake up to visit the washroom.  We found his diaper dry too.  We lavished praise on him, and again, on the second night, he kept it dry.  Even better, he woke us up to tell us he wanted to use the washroom.  He let out a little whimper, but pulled out his diaper and did his business.

The third night was better.  He did not cry, and visited the washroom again in the wee hours of the morning.  So my wife said Felix knew how to hold his bladder at night and could go on without diapers again.  How wrong were we?  We paid another heavy price.  Another wet bed that night.

I went to the trusty Internet and ran a search on Yahoo!’s search engine.  According to kidshealth.org, the condition is predominant amongst young children and they will “grow out of it”.  Eventually.

A random site suggested using hypnotism.  Another site opined the use of medication and even using some alarm to wake the child up to visit the washroom in the night.  Do we really have to go that far and take such drastic measures?  Sigh.

These mornings, when we wake up early in the morning, we would go and check on our children, exactly Felix.  And if he has not wet his bed yet, we would carry him in his sleep to the washroom, waking him up in the process for a pee, and carrying him back to his bed for a further few moments of shuteye.

What a bunch of ingrates!

I am still reeling about the news of the sacking of Chris Hughton.  I don't mean to bore non-footballing fans.  But I just have to write about this, and you should see my point, even if you have not been following the 'beautiful game'.

I cannot say that I'm an ardent fan of the team.  Not when I have never been to the much touted St. James' Park and met a Geordie (that's what they call people native to Newcastle).  Not when I have cancelled Football Channel on SCV due to economic sense (I'm the only person watching the channel in the family and it should be the first to go to cut costs).  Not when I refused to subscribe to SingTel's Mio for the same reason.  And surely not when I am unable to follow them on the Internet even with free 'live' screening due to fatigue.

But surely I am free to pour my heart out about how unfair it is to have dismissed someone who has brought them back to the premier league on the first try?  Chris must be insane for keeping his cool.  It is absolutely unfair for such an experienced man who have lived and breathed football for so many years, to be sent to the door, for no good reason!

He has, in the previous season, pulled the team together to play sensibly.  The men were downcast for having brought the club to a lower division and he guided everyone in the same direction.  He was to produce results within the shoestring budget he has had.  He could not have attracted huge signings for the club, not on his credibility nor the club's position the last year.  What happens?  The man is fired before he has a chance to prove what he can do.  This is how you reward the man??

It is absurd!  What reason do we have?  Chris is relieved of his duties because he guided the club up?  Because he managed to get the careers of the crazy Joey Barton and Sol 'Over-the-Hill' Campbell back on track?  Because he managed to produce winning results of 6-0 (vs Aston Villa), 5-1 (vs Sunderlanf), 1-0 against Arsenal in a match I feared decapitation of the club and holding Chelsea (last season's champions)to a 1-1 draw?

Sure, we lost 1-5 against Bolton recently and lost games against Blackpool and Stoke.  But we are not even at the halfway point of the season.  Surely a mid-table finish isn't too bad?  It must be acceptable, given our past years finishes at the end of the campaigns.

Whoever in control of the club's affairs must have gone bonkers, I tell you.  They bought the equally ungrateful Michael Owen, who earned a crazy sum of money sitting out most times at the sidelines, only to let him go for free to Manchester United (of all clubs!), for nothing.

The reason they gave (a big fat lie!  It's a baseless excuse!) was that Chris is inexperienced and they want to bring someone more experienced in.  Shouldn't they have done that in the first place?  When we were fighting to avoid the drop two seasons ago?  They brought in Alan Shearer, a man with no qualification to manage!  And they appointed Chris when no one wanted to take the helm of the sunken ship!  Now they let him go when they think they have turned the tide?  They even had the cheek to let the late Sir Bobby Robson and Kevin Keegan, people men with the fans, go!

Chris is one of the more well-liked and well-received men in football nowadays.  Experienced coach, humble footballer with no bad press, even at this moment - no bitching!  The players at the club are working for him!

I cannot bear to look on.  Who will they bring in now?  Martin Jol - the man who failed at Tottenham?  Gasp.  I think I will quit watching footie soon.  Maybe American Football has more logical beings.

Maximise your leave in 2011!

I have seen a couple of articles like this one before published.  You have twenty-over days of leave to take next year and your are in need of a good rest in blocks.  When do you apply if you need to forecast it early?  Let us work in a scenario that you want at least a four-day break each time, supposing you work on a five-day work-week.

New Year's Day (1 January) already falls on a Saturday.  If where you work grants the following Monday as an off-in-lieu for New Year's Day, you can try applying for leave on 4 January, Tuesday (1 day applied).  Lunar New Year falls on 3 and 4 February (Thu and Fri).  That represents a block of four days off on its own!

March sees no break and we will have to wait for 22 April for Good Friday.  You will have to take leave on 21 or 25 to get your four days' rest.  May Day or Labour Day falls on a Sunday and you should get 2 May (Monday) off.  Apply for leave on 29 April (Friday) or e May (Tuesday) to get your four-day break!  (2 days applied)

This is a must: Vesak Day (17 May) falls on a Tuesday.  Take leave on the previous day and take a rest!  (3 days applied)  Enjoy these breaks as the next few months spell doom and gloom - no holidays!  This is time to get some serious work done as you cannot leave the office.

The next holidays are National Day and Hari Raya Puasa (30 August) on Tuesdays.  Again, get Mondays on leave (5 days applied).  There is no public holiday in September and we will have to wait until late October to get some respite.  Deepavali (26 October) is on a Wednesday and I reckon it is a well-deserved time to take two days' leave here, either before (on 24 and 25) or after (on 27 and 28) to get a long five-day break (7 days applied).  Or if you are badly in need of a break to coach your children in their final year examinations just around the corner that time, take all four days' leave and you have a good eight days' time (9 days applied)!

Hari Raya Haji (6 November) falls on a Sunday and the following Monday is a public holiday.  Thus, take leave on 4 (Friday) or 8 November to get your rest (10 days applied).  Finally, Christmas Day falls on a Sunday and you can be adventurous to take a trip during the year end - take leave on 26 to 30 Dec (Monday to Friday) and you can sail into 2012 recharged (15 days applied)!

There, and you have a few days' leave left, in case you have any ad-hoc or urgent events along the year to attend to!

Who is your hero?

"Who is my hero?  I don't have a hero," Jojo frowned.  Jojo?  Yes, the clown.  You see, I was just watching Playhouse Disney with my three precious darlings.  It was "Jojo's Circus" and it happened to ask the students to present in class the next day who their favourite hero was.  "What is a hero?" Felix asked aloud, adoring eyes blinked in amazement.  Oh, who is MY hero?

First, what is a hero?  What does he / she do?  A hero can be a person from the past or present.  He / she is probably a person who attains an achievement of some sort, benefitting self and/or public.  It could be in the arena of the battlefield, sports, politics, etc.  I can rattle off many names: Liu Bei, Zhuge Liang, Troy, Napoleon, Michael Jordan, Pele, Maradona, Beckham, Rooney, Washington, Gandhi, MM Lee, etc., just to name a few.

Who is my hero?  Who has achieved so much in his / her time that has left his / her mark in society?  Whose influence has been so great?  Sure, there have been so many sporting heroes who have influenced my younger days then, when I was a very active teenager who spent much of my time in the field or the courts, whom I had imitated their plays and styles in my games and moves.  Some many whom I had dreamt about how good it was to follow their footsteps to be in bright lights...

Or perhaps it is someone who persevered against all odds.  Or someone who touched many lives.  Or...  It need not be someone famous, right?

Too many different types of heroes!  Who is my hero?  Or who is YOUR hero?

Show appreciation today!

"If it ain't broken, don't fix it," some people used to tell me when I meddle in things, trying to better situations.  Why not constantly improve?  Why not better ourselves of things around us?

A former colleague's shout-out of thanks and appreciation for his wife on their wedding anniversary today reminded me this.  I have always maintained that we should show gratitude to people around us constantly.  It need not be on our lips all the time.  It may sound insincere, or worthless, if it goes on for too much, too long.  We should thank people for helping us along our ways.

Forget the grouses you have over petty issues with your close ones.  Haven't the many things they have done for you outweighed the tiny misunderstandings?  Throw the grudges you have lain in your heart so deeply out of the window.  Rebuild ties.  Mend relationships.

Don't you wish you have not lost friends over little disagreements long ago?  Disagreements that do not mean anything to you now?  Isn't it a waste to lose an ally you can count on for assistance, than to have one more enemy who may leave you in the lurch when you are in dire straits?  Apologise.  Say thanks.  Do it today.

Today?  It's not a special day...  Yes, you've heard me right.  Today.  Shower your loved ones and friends with these and you make their day special.  Give them pleasant surprises.  Do not wait until tomorrow.  It may be too late; there may not be a tomorrow.  I know I'm going to contact my younger brother now for his long overdue bout of appreciation...  =)

Top 3 things you frown upon at your neighbourhood park / footpath

Walking along the path at my estate, I shake my head.  And again.  And again.  The reason(s)?  There are just so many things that may be deemed 'wrong', that disturbs the peace and serenity of the neighbourhood.  Or they are just plain unsightly.  Like a group of youths leaving a bench placed in public, leaving empty boxes of crushed cigarettes, dried marks of spilled drinks.  Even better - they take extreme measures to 'hide' their rubbish (this one is a mineral water bottle hidden in some plants - see if you can find it).  They find this easier to do than to walk to the dustbin just a few steps away to dispose it.

Or like a congregation of people blocking the entire walkway, laughing as shrilly as hyenas and louder than the aeroplanes that fly past our block on an almost daily basis.  They make me sigh.

Have you ever seen things like that?  Let's take a vote.  I'll provide you a list of a few things.  We all pick the most dreaded three from the list, lining them up in order of the most hatred to the least of the three using the 'comment' function here.  Leave your name in it too.  Or feel free to also add your own, giving it the next number.  I'll run this vote for a week and we'll sum it up.  Ready?  Here it goes!

Top things that you hate to see / hear at your neighbourhood park / footpath
1.  The incessant ringing from cyclists.  'Ring... ring... ring...'  You hear the ringing of bells from a bicycle approaching you from behind miles away.  So do the other pedestrians along the path.  Everyone moves to the side of the path.  But the ringing does not stop.  Turns head back to show the cyclist that you're aware of his presence.  The ringing goes on.  And it continues even after the bicycle has passed you, all the way for as long as you can hear it...  Irritating.

2.  Little dog on a leash with its owner following behind, reading from a magazine.  Dog stops by a tree beside the path, lifts one of its hind legs to do its business.  Big business sometimes.  Owner nonchalantly walks away behind its dog after that, no bag on hand to pick up after its pet.  Not sure if he even had the intention to...

3.  You are taking a leisurely morning walk at the neighbourhood estate.  You see a group of middle-age people gathered in front of you.  They talk like they are all hard of hearing.  Suddenly, someone blows his nose by pressing his thumb of his right hand at the ground in front of him.  No handkerchief.  The woman beside him stops and clears her throat, then spits phlegm at her side.  Yet another few from the group starts lighting their cigarettes.

4.  You are in a rush and are walking fast.  You suddenly stop.  The path is blocked.  A group of people are leisurely talking, taking up the whole path in front of you.  Short of them holding hands.  You ask for their forgiveness to let you through.  It falls on deaf ears.  There is no passable way as it has just rained and the grass beside the path is flooded / muddy.

5.  'Don't wash dirty linen in the public' they say.  They did not mention not to dry it.  "You know, the sun is brighter / stronger than in my flat..."

6.  This is similar to s/no. 4.  Only this time, the 'pet' is not a pet.  Mother / grandmother chats in estate with neighbours.  The poor child is left to play alone.  Minutes later, child approaches adult as he needed to answer 'nature's call'.  Adult is in the midst of an interesting discussion and does not want to leave it and bring child home.  What's the next best option?  Pull off boy's shorts, holds boy to the grass at the side of the path to ease himself.  Surely we have better sanitary facilities here in Singapore?

7.  Poom!  Poom!  The football is smashed onto the sides of the void deck and multi-purpose halls, leaving dirty ball prints on the once clean walls.  Children giggle on the sight.  Notices sign to indicate no playing of ball games where they are.  Takes aim at the sign.  Bull's eye!  Giggles turn to laughter.  People walk past them.  They do not stop, not caring if the ball were to injure an innocent passer-by.  Cyclists / skateboarders ignoring the signs not to cycle and skate in the park.  Some young cyclists pedal at such breakneck speeds that you dread to think of the consequences if they were to 'run into' a pregnant lady.

There you have it.  More?  Add on as s/no. 8 and beyond.  Let's run this until next Monday.  Which will emerge as the most hated thing seen / heard?

Feeling like a foreigner in...

"...  I said, 'Here I am, here I am, here I am...'  but why do I feel like an invisible man..." sang Joshua Kadison in his song.  Okay, not exactly my sentiments.  However, I do feel like a foreigner every time I step in Chinatown.  Huh?

Don't get me wrong.  I am born and bred in Singapore (though there is a trace of foreign blood in me from my Malaysian born parents).  But being a true blue Singaporean, you will not believe me when I tell you that I have not been to Chinatown for many times in my years.  "What?"  Yes, you've heard me right.  I seldom set foot in our busiest settlement, especially during the Lunar New Year period.

My parents had not brought me there when I was younger.  Along with my penchant for less crowded areas, Chinatown is an area I avoid like a plague.  I hate getting my toes trampled on and bumping into sweaty bodies. Not to mention the fear of getting my pocket picked.  Oh, that too - I like getting what I need and zipping out of the shopping areas (after paying, of course!).

I remember watching Lunar New Year celebration shows broadcasting 'live' from Chinatown and seeing the crowd in the background.  I do not envy the people there one bit.  All these have tallied up all my 'reasons' for not visiting Chinatown these years of my life.  During this block of leave my wife had recently, I suggested gamely to 'explore' the streets there.

We found a number of antique shops - no, not the kind selling vases; the kinds that sold old games, record-players, etc.  If you were looking for stuff used during the seventies or eighties, look no further.  You might just find what you are looking for in shops like those in Chinatown.  Looking for chinese herbs?  A seldom found type of Chinese medicine?  Medical halls are aplenty in Chinatown.

Need a History lesson?  Go to Chinatown.  There, we can find old shophouses, clothes, art forms...  You should even be able to find people who have lived past the second World War if you need to conduct interviews for projects!

I left Chinatown with my wife that day, thankful that we had made that trip.  There was so much colour, vibrance,  so many common sights that we take for granted - all found there.  I now know where my children can go if they need to work on a project on 'the early days of Singapura' later.

A note to all my former students

The dust has settled and the results are out.  You cannot change them.  They are cast in stone.  Sure, in every game and every experience in life, some people will be happy with their 'victories'; some will be disappointed and /or sad with their perceived failure.  Others will be lost as they have no inking on the implication the results will have on their life.  Sadly, that's the case.  Things are decided by us for the future, even before we know what it really means.  Regret is often too little, too late later.

Regret was what I told myself not to feel when I received my PSLE results many years ago when I was a primary six student.  You see, I had done well enough in school without needing to study in the past and my teachers had thought of me highly enough.  You can imagine the shock I had when I received my results.  Numbness was what I felt.  My classmates mostly scored twenty or thirty more marks than me and went on to prestigious schools like The Chinese High School and River Valley High School.

Nobody was on hand to advise me on my choice of schools.  I had no relatives near my age and I was ashamed to talk to my friends.  I did not know how important the six choices I had meant.  I foolishly wasted my first three choices, without doing research about cut-off points.  I went to my fourth choice - Commonwealth Secondary School.

It was perhaps lucky of me for fate to deal me such a kind hand.  It was not the best of places for me to study but I got to know some great people there in my time and bettered my sports skills (or I would not have become your PE teacher!).  Though I wasted my first three years of my secondary school life, wallowing in self-pity and turning my attention into a host of other activities (studies was definitely not one of them), I 'woke' from my 'slumber' in the final year of my secondary school days and studied whatever I should have imprinted in my brain only in the fourth year.

The result?  A lucky pass in 'O' levels and was fortunate enough to be accepted into the polytechnic.  The rest, as they say, is history.  The four salient points of my lesson published.  Take notes now.

1.  Distance is a deciding factor.  Not 'THE' factor.  Friends from old school? Not a factor; you'll make new ones anyway.  What is important is that you go to one that you will not say, "I regret coming..."  The choice now is YOURS (okay, it may be your parents').  Whatever you choose, you are going to LIVE WITH IT for years to come later.  'Regret' is a waste of time.  Make use of the time you will have in the next four or five years.

2.  Don't live in your shadows.  Don't look back and ask yourself what it could have been.  Don't waste time with these.  Work for the future.  Think far.  Think big.  What do you want to be / work as later?  It is NOT very far away, you know.  Work towards it.  An honest job is not degrading.  Nobody can look down on you but yourself.

3.  Express or normal?  I normally tell people, "Whatever you feel comfortable."  Really?  No!  Go to 'normal' first, and work hard in the first year?  You would have missed out the extra things being taught in 'express'.  By the time you switch to 'express' in year two, you will have a steeper learning curve.  Take the plunge.  Go for 'express'.  If you find that it's not your cup of tea later, switching to the other stream then is not going to be too late.

4.  Most important lesson - STOP WASTING YOUR TIME PLAYING!  STUDY!  This is the ONLY time that matters - to make it to a junior college, or not.  To ensure yourself a 'smoother' journey to the university later.  Lose these years and you might find yourself like me - at a stage of my life lamenting how lowly paid I am as a civil servant, just because I do not have a degree.  Do not rely on others.  Do not turn left and right now.  YOU HOLD THE KEY TO YOUR SUCCESS IN LIFE.

Do not ask me which secondary school you should go to now.  You will not, if you have understood me well.  Going to a 'good' school just gives you a better environment to pave your way to success.  All the best for your future and feel free to keep in touch.

Stop being a busybody??

If you see someone 'disturbing' a cat in your estate, 'poking' it in the face and body with a long, thin blade of grass, causing the poor cat to jump at the grass everytime and seemingly 'fighting' against it, would you step forward to stop the person?  If you see the person in the lift standing by the buttons not holding the door for young children to enter the lift, would you suggest that he does it the next time?

Well, that's just what I did recently.  And they are just two examples of 'Mr. Civic-Minded' at work.  I frown upon people not holding the door for the person just a step behind.  Like a stern discipline master, I lambast those who fight shamelessly for seats in trains and slump straightaway into deep slumber, beating the elderly wearing a whole head of white hair.  These are just examples.  Of course, when put in those situations, I will be the first to offer assistance.

I engaged in an interesting discussion (it leaned precariously close into an argument) with Yen yesterday.  She asked me to 'close an eye to somethings'; to 'live and let live' on things,  for the sake of her and our young ones. She explained that it was in case those 'at fault' were to react poorly against me or the situation.  I was dumbfounded.  Do I turn a blind eye to these?

Yen asked me what I had intended to achieve by pointing out what should be done instead in those situations.  Well, to put things right, hopefully, at that time.  If not, then the next time such a situation occurs.  How?  By creating public awareness.  By slamming those who do wrong and pressurizing them into doing the right thing.  My wife then pointed out that by reacting to those situations, I did not seem that gracious too.

Perhaps.  Perhaps by reacting in frustration in the spur of the moment, I, like a man forced to make a decision with a pistol pointed at his temple, could not evaluate what was the best course of action to take.  I did not want to lose the opportunity to point out what should have been done.  Sigh.  Do I just accept things?  That some people are just the way they are, that they 'were not taught to be as thoughtful and will have to learn some other way' - as Yen put it?  Maybe that is my problem - that I am too much of a busybody?

Our Christmas tree

We are not Christians.  Well, at least not yet.  It had never been a family tradition to have a Christmas tree up during the Christmas holidays.  It was until I got married and moved into our current flat, which had a little more space and is seemingly less 'cluttered', that Yen and I purchased a Christmas tree and shopped for decorations.

I think I was saying that I wanted our children to know and 'feel' the celebrations for the festive occasions.  Well, somehow, I did not put up big red decorations for the Lunar New Year.  I wonder why?

Christmas these past few years have seen us set up a tree for the festival at home.  Thus far, our elder princess and prince have been obedient when told not to go near the tree, not to lay their hands on it.  So we decided to set it up again this year.  And we were going to involve our children henceforth.  How exciting it will be for them now, I thought.  I was right.

I have been telling them that we were going to put up the said tree soon, but we had not found the opportune time yet.  Rachel and Felix sure had their eyes glimmering with excitement when they saw the foreign-looking box containing the Christmas tree sitting in the living room after their nap on the past Sunday.

They could not wait to get started in helping out too.  From the word 'go', they wrapped their little hands all over the tree.  I had a hard time trying to tell them what to do whilst trying to figure it out myself too.  You cannot blame me for my predicament.  I see the tree for about a month annually and this is only our fourth meeting!

Our ever-enthusiastic children helped set the tree up and put the decorations on it.  Blame it on their height that they were constantly decorating the same place of the tree closest to them!  Yen and I had to constantly remind them to move to other places around the tree to hang their mini 'disco balls', 'snowflakes', etc. on different parts of the tree.

 

All these, too, while we tried to capture the precious moments of their joy on camera so that they can grow up and reminisce on these good times they had.

The result?  An exuberant pair of children, proud of their good work.  And a silent destroyer in the form of their young baby sister.

 

Taking a family photograph

I have always envied my friends who have family photographs displayed at home.  To me, it somehow examplifies the close bonds the family has built within itself across the years.  It is with joy too, to see the progress in the members of the family - the ageing (in a nice way!), the growing of the children, the addition of members, the upgrade of status (think education - taking a photograph after receiving a university degree by each child-member).

I have never had one taken.  That is why when my father passed on a few years ago, I felt a sense of void.  I felt regret, something that I normally tell myself not to have in life.  Regret that I had not been able to let my father lead a comfortable life before he moved on.  Regret that I had not given him the opportunity to see his elder son get married and let him carry his own grandchild.  Regret that he left us too little memories.

My father was a man of few words.  He rarely spoke to us.  Much less take photographs.  The only one that he left me was this 5R one of him at work.  Think he was not aware of someone taking that photograph and it was probably given to him as a souvenir of his long service with his former employer, Port of Singapore Authorities.

I respected him as my father.  However, I cannot say that we were extremely close as family.  We hardly did things together.  Sigh.  When I looked at my friends and their parents, I sometimes turn green...  But I digress.  I want a family photograph with my own family.  For memories.  For reminiscing later.

I was making use of this month-long break to tidy up my things that I had just stashed away in my study last week when I came across this receipt.  To my pleasant surprise, it was one dated 14 Dec 2004, from a phtography studio.  The package I bought was for photography services of some basic photograph-package.  Excited, I called the company (had to make sure that it was still in operation) to check that it honoured my receipt.  I then proceeded to make an appointment for a family photography shoot the following Sunday.

Fast forward.  Today was the day.  It was a huge challenge getting my three jewels co-operating in front of the camera.  Torturous at times.  I almost pulled some hair off my scalp this afternoon and got a quick hair-trim.  But we managed to get through it and I came back a happy man.  I will not get to hang up the pictures on my wall so soon, but it will be in time for Christmas, I think.  Great!  One more milestone reached in my family's journey.

What English is that?

No, you've guessed it wrong.  I am not writing this in support of our Government's Speak Good English movement.  Sure, there is quite a bit of wrong signages everywhere.  Perhaps those who manufacture the signages ought to have professional English checkers.  Then, end of story.  No more problem.  I am actually writing about the English on books teaching English to our impressionable infants and toddlers, our future.

We as parents buy toys that, hopefully, teach our children things as they play.  This is especially so for books.  But I have come across some play-stuff that need our attention, rectification (probably).  This is a set of flashcards that teaches children English as well as Chinese languages, showing the intended audience pictures of the words.  Not sure its place of origin. (If you are thinking about China, I urge you not to always condemn goods from China.  It is not fair!)

Where does my problem with it stem from?  Take a look at this one:

A 'washer' is defined as a 'washing machine' in 'dictionary.com'.  However, in this part of the world we are, we are taught that the item pictured is a 'washing machine'.  Children may be confused with the different terms used to identify the same thing at the young age they are at.  Another example:

Isn't it a laptop?  The word 'computer' is more generally used to point to the personal computer, or desktop.  The one with a Central Processing Unit and a monitor, where a separate keyboard and mouse is normally attached to make it work.  Confused.  Think that's all?  You're wrong.  Look:

The former shows, when, a bell (clock).  The latter shows a clock (alarm clock) as well.  And both are not actually bells!  You have made me a confused child!  More:

'Counter'?  'Scoop'?  'Dentifrice'?  'Handset'?  Aren't they more commonly known here as 'calculator', 'ladle', 'toothpaste' and 'mobile phone' (okay okay, many call it 'handphone', but that's the South-east Asian term for the item!) here?  Can we not see that it is a tube of toothpaste in the second picture here?  Why make it difficult with 'dentifrice' - 'a paste, powder, liquid, or other preparation for cleaning the teeth'?

I reckon that as parents, we have to play a bigger part in the learning of our young children.  We cannot just buy stuff and hope for our children to learn the correct things from them.  We have to step in to discern between right and wrong too.  Else, our children may learn the wrong things and it will be difficult for them to 'unlearn' these things later...

School's out!

School's out, officially today!  No more books, no more classes and studies, no more teachers for children - all until the end of the year, at least.  No need to worry about our children's results and behaviour in school for children.  Sounds all good, but is it really?
Sorry, I beg to differ.  Being at home most times this month, it is the beginning of a nightmarish end of the end for me.  How?  You see, the way HDB flats are built these days are revolving around the concept of little estates.  A few block of flats will be built in a oval-shaped manner, or sporadically around some amenities like car parks, badminton courts, playgrounds, multi-purpose halls, etc.  Great idea?  Perhaps not.

When children have their holiday breaks, as experienced over the past few years I have stayed here, they have nowhere to 'hang out'.  The best place would be the playground and badminton court area.  Healthy lifestyle, so what is the problem?  It is when they let their hair down and get so engaged with their games that they create excessive noise, screaming and shouting for hours, on a daily basis on weekdays.  The noise is enclosed within the blocks and is brought upwards.  I stay on the upper floot of my block not too near (at least not next to the amenities) and I still get it quite bad.  I cannot imagine if my block of flats is any closer to the heat of the action.

Along with that, they play football at the multi-purpose hall area.  I am fine with them 'dirtying the walls', but I frown at the noise created and the safety-hazard they  pose when they play on and children / old folks walk close to the hall.  They are sometimes oblivious to the people / things around...  sigh...  Not to mention the vulgarities they spout!  Puts us adults to shame with their wonderful vocabulary, sometimes...

What can we do about it then?  Short of rounding them up and putting them behind bars for 'disrupting public serenity' (don't think there is such a law)?  Can their parents sign them up for some holiday class that will take their time away until parents take them home after work?  (Isn't that akin to childcare / studentcare?  Don't they want to lay of learning and books for this time?)  Or can some organisation come out with some novel idea that engage them?  Somebody?  Anybody?...

Itch itch!

“Eeeek!” Rachel screamed.  “What is this?”  she asked curiously, pointing to the many red dots spread across Kayleen’s back.  Yen and I took a closer look.  Yes, what was it?  Was it some kind of illness she picked up from her week at the play-school?

The dots were like rashes.  I checked her rashes against some pictures I found on the Internet when I searched for ‘childhood skin conditions’.  HFMD?  No.  Chicken pox?  Definitely not.  A match with a few more pictures proved a failed attempt.  And thankfully too.  So what was it really?  I told Yen that we would bring her to the doctor’s if her condition worsened the next day.

I forgot that it was the holidays - Hari Raya Haji.  Polyclinics close on that day!  Fortunately there are two clinics in the neighbouring Pioneer Mall.  We found that her condition had not improved the evening of the holiday – the rashes have spread to the front of the body, her neck and also her calves.  Though I would still consider them mild, we decided to bring her to the opened clinic for a visit.

The rashes do not see too obvious in the pictures, no thanks to the bright lights the pictures were taken under.  But if you do notice the red spots, redden them by five to ten times in your imagination and you'd get a better idea of what we had seen..

The wait was not too long as we had made a telephone call to the clinic to get a queue number prior to our visit.  The doctor who saw Kayleen decided straightaway that it was not the dreaded HFMD, nor was it chicken pox or anything very serious.  He did not attempt to guess what it was; merely said it was some allergy.  He issued our younger princess with two days’ medical leave and some medication.

Kayleen still seemed a little restless.  Other than that, she is fine today.  She is not scratching on the rashes as much today.  We have not used any other the medication the doctor had prescribed for our princess, thanks to advice from Yen (Mommy knows best!).  The episode raised another mini-alarm in our household – just another day in the life of a parent with three young children, I guess…

Print, print, everywhere

"Look, daddy!  'Stop'!" Felix exclaimed excitedly.  That followed the most adorable laughter from Rachel and him.  I smile.  "Yes, daddy stopped the car...  How do you spell the word?" I replied.  I was secretly glad that they could recognise and spell the word, at the ages four and three respectively.  I am not sure if I could have spelt the word when I was their age.  No, I don't think I could.

Yes, their play-school has played their part in teaching them to read, to recognise letters.  I reckon the 'Hi-5!' and other CDs must have aided their learning.  The Government and everyone else chip in by displaying signages (some worded) in numerous places.  Yen and I would make use of these to try teach our elder children to recognise those words and if possible, try spell them.

I go a step further.  I try to seize every opportunity I can to help them spell words.  If they are learning and remembering due to phonics, that is great.  Else, I try to make them repeat after me.  To me, a word learnt now at their tender age means a word less to learn for spelling, or whatever, later.  Felix can spell quite a few names of animals, many simple words (like 'go', 'team', 'love', etc.) and 'one' to 'ten', with aplomb!  Now, even some of my former students cannot do that in primary three / four!

I tried to list out the words that Felix can spell, and at age three, the number of words amaze me.  I lost count.  Sure, I worry that it is memory work mostly.  I know that when I read with him, and he constantly get words that he should be able to pronounce wrong.  But there is a long way ahead, a long time to learn.

Just today, I decided that since the walls of the passageway leading to their room is bare, and we have bought a few wall charts for them, I should make use of the charts to decorate the wall.  In the same way, I hope my two elder children and later, Kayleen, will always stop by and recall the words and how they are spelt.

I have seen it somewhere that some take greater effort, by labelling the things around the house and sticking them on the things (e.g. Stick the word 'Refrigerator' and its chinese characters on the item itself).  At this moment, I need not do that.  But who knows, in a year or two, I'll make it into a game and ask the children to stick the words onto the items by themselves.  *Tsk tsk*

I think I have bought more of such charts and stashed them somewhere earlier.  Better find them soon and put them up.  Bought them anyway - better make the money 'money well spent'!   They enjoy reading and listening to us read to them.  Again, I make a conscious effort to make them lead me through the words and help them when they are stuck.  I'll be glad if they can finish books (albeit short ones) by themselves a little later.

I am a little worried at their ability to converse in Mandarin, though.  Our children seem to prefer using the English language, even when we speak to them in Mandarin.  Not that there is anything wrong, but we want them to be effectively bilingual.  Not to mention that it is still going to be tested later in school.  We have bought them Chinese CDs, tried speaking to them and insisting that they answer in Mandarin...  Ha.  Starting to see the anxiety parents have when their children take examinations.

Does anyone tried sucessfully for their children to converse in mother tongue?  Do give me some ideas.  Or is tuition classes the way to turn to??

Perhaps it is a 'rewarding' career after all??

"Why choose teaching as a profession?" the interviewer asked me five years ago at my job interview.  I had a ready (well thought through) answer.  I wanted to impact and influence the lives of children, who I believe can make changes to contribute to the society, to become useful persons.  Five years later, after withdrawing myself from the ministry, how much of that has changed?

Not too much, I guess.  After all, I am not a hypocrite, to have said things I did not believed in, just to clinch the job.  That's why I am still in the profession.  It is just that I have changed my employer, the environment.  The target audience is still the same - students.

Some, like my good buddy Wilson's mother, have went on and on to share with me the joys of teaching, on how rewarding a career it would be.  I guess it would be one, but was just not too sure if I would stay sane enough to reap the rewards of the seeds I sow.  I mean - I will have to wait years - and I emphasise, YEARS - to have an inking of my former students' success in life, for them to grow up and have their own jobs and families...

The first wave of rewards, perhaps, is usually from the parents.  Their commendations, their praises, their thanks - the first sign of whether you have taught, or not, to their children.  Before you get turned off here, I just want to quantify again that this is not my avenue of self-glorification, of narcissism.  No, just a reflection of things in life...  Back to the subject at-hand...

My students may remember me telling them, borrowing a phrase, "I am not teaching you how to pass your examinations and tests; I am teaching you how to 'fish', so that you will not starve when you are on your own in future..."  I am not sure how many of them understood what I meant when I told them what I said, but I sincerely hope they will 'see the light', sooner rather than later.

I do not think I am that likeable to my students as an English language teacher (they could like my Physical Education lessons, though).  Thus, I have not, in my short span of three years as a teacher in school, received many notes of thanks and appreciation.  However, I am always happy when parents of my students tell me, in the form of verbal confrontations, text messages, emails or letters, that their children love to be in my class and have been learning a lot from me.  Or they could just thank me for my effort I had put in.  That is enough for me.

One of my former students' parents did more than that this morning.  Mrs Chew, mother of Sherman, called me up the previous night to ask me to meet her as she had something to pass to me.  It was, she said, some chocolates / sweets for my children, in appreciation for the time I had spent working with Sherman on my own free will.

You see, I had planned to leave the ministry some time ago and this year, I just thought I wanted to do more for some of my students.  I approached two of them - Qishun and Sherman - and asked them if they were interested in doing some additional work in English language with me.  They were both my students in my maiden year as a form teacher in 2008, P4 Robin.  Why them?  Were they THAT poor in the language, you might ask?  Were they financially poor that they cannot afford tuition lessons?  No, on the contrary, they were my number two and three in the class at the end of that year.  I asked them as I thought they are very hardworking and driven, and should benefit with an extra adult looking at their work with them.

Why not other students?  Was I not being fair?  You see, I did not close off all doors to other students.  If any student were to approach me to ask me why I was being unfair and doing extra with only these two, I would have invited them to join us with open arms.  I asked the two of them merely because I believed that they would want me to 'do some work' with them.  I gave them extra work - on top of those that they have been given in school and at tuition - and they completed the work faithfully almost everytime I asked them to, giving me no excuses for anything that would have thwarted their attempts to complete work I asked them to do.

We had our weekly, two-hour session in an open area of the school while I was still a member of the school I was teaching.  From June, we had our sessions in Tiong Bahru Plaza.  Thankfully, we were not chased out by the management and staff at the Burger King there.  We were not distracted by the people or things around us.  The sessions were enjoyable.

I received a text message from Sherman's mother, saying that she wanted to pass me something as a form of their gratitude to me for having 'tutored' their son.  I did not ask, neither did I expect to receive anything, so I did not know what to expect.  I met them at the front gate of the school this morning and spoke to them.  They expressed their thanks for my having helped their son for nothing, and spending my 'personal' time.  It left a warm feeling in my heart, knowing that we had done the best we could in our circumstances for Sherman, and I could recognise the unconditional love in Mr and Mrs Chew.

I had not spent time doing extra 'work' with the two boys for the bag of sweets that came from Japan.  I had not done them for money (though it would have helped me financially...).  It was, perhaps, the joy of teaching, the smile that I hope to see on the faces of the children and their parents come next week, or for something more meaningful they were going to do later in life.