Silly me - check the tyres!

My boy, Felix, has weak legs!  He can hardly get the bicycle moving!  Or so I thought...

I brought Rachel and Felix downstaris just the other day as Kayleen was still asleep.  The bicycle with training wheels that sat in a corner in their bedroom had gathered a few inches of dust and I thought it might be good for them to get moving once in a while too.

As we only bought one bicycle, the children had to take turns.  Rachel seemed to find it hard to cycle initially, but she got going gradually.  I attributed it to her being 'rusty' as she had not been cycling for sometime and was not used to it.  When Felix had his turn, I found him not being able to move the bicycle.  "Weak legs," I had thought, due to his being a year younger.  Throughout the near hour-long session in which the duo took turns on the bicycle, we had to push Felix or he would hardly be moving on it.

A couple of days later, something struck me.  I remembered how my brother, Eddie, found it difficult to turn the wheels of my car and he concluded after a week that the tyres were not fully pumped.  He was right.  Could the tyres to our children's tyres have suffered the same fate?  I checked when I returned home later and confirmed my suspicions.  Silly me!  The tyres were almost totally flat!  How could the children have been able to cycle on the bicycle?

That night, Yen and I took them down again.  They cycled with ease!  Ha.  A new experience for me - check on the tyres before cycling!

Family's first overseas trip

I have always wanted to give our three precious gems more experiences.  Learning through personal experiences, they say.  The problem is 'Vitamin M'.  It costs an arm and a leg of us to fly somewhere, I reckon.  That has kept me from opening my mouth to suggest going on a trip.  Sigh...

Somehow, a stroke of luck has seen that we could finally fulfil my wish of taking the children on a trip!  We planned a little and decided that for the children, we shall go to a country with a Disneyland.  America's too far, Japan's too expensive, Europe's both...  that left us to Hong Kong.  So it was decided.  Here we come!

It was during the trip that I understood what my friends / acquiantances have always meant when they say 'bonding takes place on the trip'.  To me, that could always happen in Singapore if we do spare time for our children.  But I saw what they meant while I was there on the first night: there were no distractions (switched off my mobile, no Internet connection too), no one else that I knew there (except them!), no need to drive them and worry about road conditions...  I was completely involved in planning for their having fun and making sure they stay safe in the meantime.  Nothing else was there to take my attention from them!

I learnt more about our three jewels, starting from the plane ride from Changi.  They were naturally excited as it was their first ever plane ride though they had to be woken in the wee hours of the morning.

We visited Disneyland on the first day after arriving the resort a little after lunchtime.  Checked into the hotel after viewing fireworks.  Children were dead beat and slept soundly.  Think Disneyland is not too big and our children were not very enthusiastic about returning on the second day.  So we ventured out to Kowloon.  Went up the fourth tallest building in the world - Hong Kong's International Commerce Centre (ICC), or simply Sky100.

Spent some time there and went for late lunch.  Some more walking and shopping for Yen.  Transferred to hotel in Kowloon that night.

Went on the guided tour on the third day.  Visited a few places - Repulse Bay, a famous jeweller's, Aberdeen Harbour, took a cable car ride on Ngong Ping 360 to Lantau Island.  Ventured to Temple Street Night Market to do a little shopping.  Kayleen was crying the whole way on the cable car trip to Lantau Island.  I held her in my arms to soothe her.  I don't think she is afraid of heights; she probably just did not like the feeling of being high up.  She was better during the return trip to land on the cable car and even laughed along to her elder siblings when they played.

What's a trip to Hong Kong without visiting Ocean Park?  That was where we went on the last day.  Throughout the trip, Rachel gave us the least problems and dared to try out most rides.  She was the only one who took photographs with every mascot we stopped for pictures.  She posed willingly everytime and was a joy to have around.

It had been time well spent.  Think our children had a lot of fun!  Yen and I did not have to attend to anything but our precious children throughout the trip and we spent, not just quantity but, quality time with the children.  It was tremendous.  I look forward to the next family trip together, money and time permitting...

Giving children experiences

How do children start standing on their feet?  How do they start doing a lot of things on their own, interacting with others?  How do we let them connect with the world, and what their teachers and friends are talking about in and outside of classrooms?

Apart from teaching them (and teaching them well!), I thought the other thing we can do for them is to equip them with lots of experiences; to let them see the many interesting things in the world.  Let them see the world through their own eyes and not ours; experiential-learning, if I may borrow the term used too much from MOE.

That is one of the reasons we enrolled them in play-school.  Let them learn to swim (hopefully) than sink once we let go of them.  At times, when we take on the role of their teacher, our children tend to learn less effectively as they would throw tantrums and such with us.

When their godfather asked if we were interested in letting the elder two watch a musical put up by their school (children under the age of three were supposedly not admitted), we jumped at the chance.  Why not?  Let's go and enjoy the performance as a family, I thought.  So on Thursday, 28 July 11, we got to Republic Polytechnic to watch Kuo Chuan Presbyterian's one-night only musical.

Rachel and Felix probably did not understand and had no premonition of what was going to happen then, but once the performance began, they were rather capticvated by it.  In between scenes, Felix was so engaged in the show that he kept asking aloud, "Where is Justin (the lead character)?"

All in all, it was a good first experience for the duo.  They were well behaved and did not throw tantrums though the performance ended a little too close to their bedtime for comfort.  We can safely plan for more experiences for them, knowing that they can 'rise to the occasion'.  A trip to the movies now beckons...

Felix is well! =)

Just as I thought Felix was the sole survivor of this episode of chicken pox in the family, I found myself wrong again.  I had dropped all three of them back at school two Mondays ago.  I was glad that they were back to play and learn, and I had some time on my own to catch up with work in the day.  Two hours later, I was asked to bring our boy back.  The reason?  Two small 'water bubbles', which had previously gone unnoticed, on Felix's neck.

So here we go again.  Felix had it mild in the first two days, but the pox invaded his thin body gradually.  It came at such great speed later that I asked if the pox were going to stop growing.  He seemed to have it bad too.  He cringed a lot and cried due to discomfort at night.  Yen and I had to take turns to go soothe him and many a time, he would end up sleeping in our bed after that.

Felix and I bonded quite well in the day.  We had a little 'system', where I would see to his bathing, getting breakfast and all for a couple of hours after I return from sending everyone off to work and school.  He would then choose to play with his toys or turn on the television to watch shows on Playhouse Disney while I marked or took a short nap.  Other days, I would insist on him doing work on the Nursery workbook that I had bought him, or his worksheets from his phonics class which he had missed.

We would have lunch after that, he played some more and read before taking his daily nap.  Most times, I would read to him from his encyclopedias.  While he napped, I continued with work before leaving to fetch his two sisters.  He played or watched shows after that.

As I had anticipated, he had a little problem leaving home for school after spending a month away.  Fortunately, I had bought him this book about 'Bugs' and I enticed him to go by asking him to bring it along to school to show it to his friends.  It had been a busy, but fulfilling month for me.

The dreaded pox

"Daddy, the play-school called.  They said Rachel is having some red dots on her back.  They fear it may be chicken pox as there is an outbreak in school currently.  Can you go bring her home?" Yen called me in the afternoon.

Gosh.  One issue after another.  On well.  It is probably inevitable.  Yen says the timing may be good as she would rather the children have this particular illness sooner, rather than later.  And all three will probably have the illness, one after another.  I agree, but have some reservations on their ages - Kayleen is only two-plus and she will not understand too much on why she should not scratch herself when she feels the itch.  That will leave a few nasty scars, I fear.

I went to their play-school a little later.  I was told that Rachel had been isolated, kept in the office once they noticed and suspected the signs and symptoms.  She did not have fever then.  While waiting at the door for all three of them, Kayleen's teacher carried her out and realised that our younger girl might have the spots too.

I brought them home.  Fearing the worst, I showed Rachel some pictures of people having chicken pox I found on the Internet and warned her against scratching herself when it itched.  I changed Kayleen out of the pyjamas and discovered some pox-like spots on her back.    Funny no one had realised the spots I found when Kayleen was being bathed.

Pox on Rachel's left shoulder...

 

...her tummy...



... and left arm



On Kayleen's back

 I went to work after informing Yen of my find.  She brought them to the doctors later and had them certified that they suffered from chicken pox.  Sigh.  Think Felix will get the illness from his sisters later.  I keep my fingers crossed that they will not suffer from the itch and pain / discomfort, and have minimal 'battle scars' on their bodies...




Spunky Kayleen on Day 1 of pox



Day 2 - not so spunky anymore

Making mistakes

"Rachel!  You are doing this wrong, again!" I was exasperated.  Why could she not write it correctly?  I had not stopped to explore the reasons why she got things wrong all this while.  I had not been encouraging.  Instead, I had admonished her over any tiny mistake, so much so that she is now lying to shirk responsibilty, to avoid being castigated.  Is this the kind of father I want to be??

A friend recently commented that he had seen my elder children with me, and from their actions / behaviour when they were with me, he could see that we have been spending time together, that we had been bonding.  I sure am glad to hear that.  But is this time "quality time", what I had been searching for since their birth??

Recently, I had been threatening her that I would buy a cane.  She wailed.  I felt bad.  I had thought that 'that' would solve problems of wrongful behaviour.  I had not seen the 'lying' part coming.  I think I had failed.

I think I can still change things.  I will have to remind myself that all of us make mistakes.  "To err is with human" - a phrase I know so well and had been telling the children whom I had been working with in the course of my job.  Can I, instead, laugh with them when they err and help my three gems learn from mistakes?  To assume responsibility and not be afriad to try?

Being the 'disciplinarian' in the family - am I taking this too seriously?  Do I have to rebuke and punish for every mistake?  Does that help them in their lives later?  Already, I lament that we do not spend enough time together.  Can I make us value the time we have together and let them look forward to my home-coming from work on nights that I work?  They deserve a childhood full of fun and laughter, amist learning!!

I am learning.  I have a lot of work to do to change myself.  This is, perhaps, being a reflective practitioner.

Our sprinter girl

Ta-ta-ta-ta...  "Whoa!  Rachel can sure run fast, can't she?"  I commented to Yen after spotting Rachel run across our room to her own.

"Oh, yes.  You should check out her face after her 'run' too!"  Yen offered.  What did Yen mean?  I have not been at home at nights enough, due to work.  Worried, I went over to our children's room.  Felix was sprawled on his bed, reading.  And Rachel?  She sat on hers, with little tears in her eyes.

It turned out that our eldest girl, is afraid of the dark in four-and-a-half.  It was funny as I had never noticed this earlier.  Yen concluded that she must have developed this 'condition' lately after being told some scary story in play-school.  Rachel did not offer anything.  She barely shook her head and cried when I asked her to walk alone in the dark to another room.

These few weeks had been trying due to a host of reasons - monetary woes from me, rushing of work for both Yen and me, and battling with illnesses in the recent week.  I spent some time to try to coax Rachel to let me in on the origin of her fear but had not got far.  The only thing I had succeeded was to get her to walk to unlit places, with Felix holding her hand.

Last night saw a change - one that I hope would not rebound back to its original state too soon.  Kayleen came crying when I was reading with Rachelk and Felix in their bedroom.  "Mickey mouse..." Kayleen offered, in between her sobs.  She was referring to her 7-inch plush toy that Uncle Eddie and Aunt Huijun had given her during their last trip to Hong Kong.  The toy had been her best friend ever since she lay her hands on it.

"Felix, where did you leave it just now?  I saw you playing with it last," I queried.  I told him to look for it and return it to Kayleen.  "I...  I'm scared...  it's too dark..."  It was Felix's turn now!  Sigh!  Looking around, I saw Rachel reading.  Surely I cannot...  Let me try.

"Rachel, can you hold di-di's hand to go look for Mickey in daddy's room?" I suggested to our elder girl.  "Huh?  What?  Felix, (are) you afraid of the dark?  There's nothing to be afraid of!  Come, let's go..."  And of she led Felix, to my room to look for the toy, and came back successfully within seconds.